October 20, 2011 § Leave a comment
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.
– JRR Tolkien
October 18, 2011 § Leave a comment
that’s what it was. i was primed for it. but today i will defy the tenets of modern biology – i’m throwing the antibodies out. no one can come along poking me with their fucking antigens – so quit trying.
most regrettably however, the natural attraction between two piles of trash cannot be undone: pitcher plant + mucked up mustard = ??? haha yeah man like what i said, i’d gladly supply all the HGH injections and black hair dye for you and your progeny cause really, i do love helping people in need :D
October 11, 2011 § Leave a comment
one month ago. i was given the opportunity to shed the lies and jumpstart a new beginning. it was a fantastic wake up call, an unexpected transformation – for the better :D i’m no longer afraid of being mean (gosh, given the scenario, can anything i do or say in retaliation count as mean??!) and i think you should know EXACTLY what went through my mind. i don’t care about the consequences cause there will be none. you are stranger than a stranger. and you are more than welcome to remain as one :D
i guess i have to say regretfully at this point of time that i’ve never met anyone in my life who’s so crummy. so ill. so grotesque. so selfish, so oily, so unreliable, so fake that he himself doesn’t differentiate the true from the false. i know that it must be a sad sad situation when i have to speak so badly of someone, because for me to do so the person has to be out of this world despicable. it is tragic that he still thinks he has the right to anything, anything of mine at all. any sympathy, any friendship, any time from me at all. it’s also tragic that i once allowed this person to poison and delude me. truth is, now i feel blessed to be awoken from this sweet nightmare sooner than i had expected. what are you so proud of? what do you have that is of your own? distracted, shallow, cowardly glib-talker. Possessive yet unfaithful. to think that i actually thought that any of these meant anything at all was the most outrageous mistake of my life. it’s a failed investment on something that i doubt would be of any value now or in the future. unless this person wakes up.
i am glad. i am thankful. that after i have been used and abused, i have made up my mind to erase this person in entirety from my life. i was in denial. i was irrationally hopeful. but guess what – i was not in love with you. i was in love with the idea of you. the idea that you could be someone that i could hang on to. how twisted, how laughable. to pay for this mistake i became a stepping stone, i gave everything to this person – on retrospect, none of which he deserved. i lost my mind! but it’s all over cause NOW i have my ‘head on straight’. i no longer play with illusions – i can see right through you. i feel sorry for you. and you should for yourself too. because you are so incomplete, so broken, so transient. SO YESTERDAY.